Crushed by my Celebrity Crush's Height

1/20/2011

From my own collection. Davy's in front.

When I was twelve I had a major crush on a Monkee. No, not the cute, furry animal. I’m talking about one of The Monkees, a popular band from the late Sixties. Every afternoon I watched reruns of their old show, which featured Micky Dolenz, the funny one, Peter Tork, the shy one, Michael Nesmith, the one with the hat (don’t ask), and Davy Jones, the totally hot and groovy one.

I LOVED DAVY.

He was soooo cute and, boy, could he rock the tambourine. I would spend hours daydreaming about him, envisioning us slow dancing to ‘I Wanna Be Free’ in a flowery meadow while the sun’s rays danced in our hair. So magical.

Well, guess what? A few months into our fake relationship I discovered Davy Jones was only 5’3”. 5’3”!! I was already 5’5” with no signs of shrinking and, as much as I ‘loved’ him, visions of his head resting on my shoulder didn’t have quite the same affect on me. I was devastated.

As I got older, and taller, my celebrity fantasies continued to suffer. Tom Cruise? 5’8”. Johnny Depp? 5’10”. Oh, the humanity!!

In order to keep you from the same fate, I wasted considerable time researching the heights of Hollywood’s hottest young celebs. You can check out my ‘Hotties for every Height’ chart below or search my more comprehensive list of over 60 of Hollywood's finest young celebrity males' heights(Channing Tatum or Chace Crawford, anyone?) by clicking here. Either way, I've got a hunk for you, no matter how tall you are.

Unitl next time, sweet dreams. And don't say I've never done anything for you. ;)

Yes, girls. Justin Bieber is that short.

18 Comments

timethief link

1/20/2011 12:30:46 am

I smiled as I read this. :) I never had teenage crushes on celebrities. I remember the Monkees although I never had a crush on one. My friends and I never took them seriously as they weren't very good musicians. We believed they had been "invented" for TV and rarely watched their show.

Height has never been an important factor in my relationships. However, that being said, I did marry my dark and handsome best friend who was both considerably taller and younger than me.

nothingprofound link

1/20/2011 12:52:36 am

Interesting note about "some" of the tall women I've known. They loved to wear high heels, put their hair up, to make themselves appear even taller. They got a real kick out of towering over the boys. However, I've never known a short woman who wanted to appear even shorter, though many of them liked the fact that they were short and wouldn't want it any other way..

Afef link

1/20/2011 01:39:42 am

that's such a cool chart :D *cough* i never thought about celebrity heights as ... as... i'm barely 5" ^^;; we're really short people over here!

Davey was also my fav when i used to watch reruns of the show :Di think my biggest teen celebrity crush was robbie williams :O (he was more like a man than a teen already lol!)

Mom link

1/20/2011 02:10:45 am

TT,
I think you we're right on about the Monkees being 'invented,' something that's all together too common these days. As for your hubbie? Sounds like a 'crush worthy' guy to me! ;)

NP,
For the longest time I refused to wear heels because my husband was shorter than me. Eventually, though, my love for shoes wore out. I had to chuckle when my husband saw Nicole Kidman and Keith Urban on the TV earlier this week.. He said, "Look at her in heels. She's so much taller than him." To which I replied, "Honey, that's what WE look like when we go out."

Afef,
Five feet tall? Looks like you've got a wide selection to choose from then!! As for Robbie Williams? Not bad taste!

PhotoDiction link

1/20/2011 08:45:31 am

i had to laugh as I read through this. i remember a blind date that I went on, just after high school. She towered over me by about 6 inches. I couldn't help but feel like a child as she looked... waaay down... at me. And I'm not that short. LOL Of course, I had all kinds of difficulty keeping to my 'gentlemanly gaze' whenever I turned in her direction. ;)

Mom link

1/20/2011 11:10:11 am

PhotoDiction,
I don't know who to feel more sorry for, you or her! As a tall girl, myself, I've had my share of awkward moments like that. As for keeping a 'gentlemanly gaze'? I can just imagine the two obstacles before you. hehe!

Justus Steel link

1/21/2011 06:39:56 am

Size matters. Height size, that is. I'm not sure I could date a girl taller than me. It would just feel odd. If only cause that's the way of the world for the most part. But Mickey Dolenz was totally 99% of the talent in the Monkees. I grew up on their reruns right after the Brady Bunch, and didn't realize til much later that Mickey wrote and sang all the meaningful stuff they did. Shame Hollywood wanted to make them into an American Beatles.

Mom link

1/21/2011 07:41:50 am

Justus,
Thanks for the honesty. Many guys feel that way. Girls, too. And about the Monkees? Strangely enough, after I found out Davy was so short I moved on to Mickey. 'I'm Not Your Stepping Stone' was a cooler song than 'I Wanna Be Free' anyway! ;)

Jeremy from We Took The Bait link

1/22/2011 07:15:28 pm

I think that's just the Frontman Syndrome.

Like, every high school girl circa '83 wanted to get with Simon Le Bon.

And, who can even name another member of Duran Duran?

I can't.

Though, Frontman Syndrome is, arguably, how I met my wife. So, I'm happy with it.

Then again, I'm not 5'3".

I'm 5'1".

Kidding. No, seriously. Kidding.

Mom link

1/22/2011 11:33:40 pm

Jeremy,
I agree, though Davy was the cutest of the bunch. Too funny you mentioned Simon Le Bon. At 6'1" he was right up my alley. ;)

BTW, now I'm all curious on how you met your wife. Hmmmmmm....

Nicone link

1/24/2011 11:05:32 pm

Hi Mom. Thanks for the eye-candy! But they're oh so young (they all look like my step-son who's 18). They're probably meant for you teen readers, but I keep peeping in on you because you make me laugh. THANX. :-D

Mom link

1/24/2011 11:10:10 pm

Nicone,
Ha ha! Yep, meant for the teens. Can't tell you how hard it was for me to exclude Brad Pitt (5'11") and George Clooney (5'10-3/4" -- love it when they break it down into quarters!) from the list. Gotta say, if I were a tad younger (actually A LOT younger) and single, I might have a photo of one of them under my pillow!

The redhead link

1/25/2011 02:32:30 am

There is no way Davy is 5'3" No freaking way! I guess his primate-ness makes him appear larger.

Mom link

1/25/2011 02:45:18 am

Redhead,
I think you're on to something!

Jen link

2/29/2012 05:43:07 am

I never realized being so short (I'm 5'4'' on a good day) would open up my options so much! I can STILL date Justin Bieber. Thank god.

Mom link

2/29/2012 05:55:43 am

Whew! What a cruel day it would have felt like had you realized you couldn't date the Biebs. And you're right, being 5'4" does open up your options. At 5'11" I didn't have a wide selection in high school.

tattoo ideas for men link

10/3/2012 01:27:47 am

Such quality content! I find this article very informative. I am waiting for your next post. Keep it up.

Megan

7/11/2016 02:32:48 pm

Yeah, that's just silly. Davy Jones trained as a jockey. He could handle a 1200 lb high-spirited thoroughbred. I hardly think a lady a couple of inches taller than he would intimidate him. Oh, and there was the thing about him spending several years as THE international mega-star sex-god of choice. So he was short? WOULD DO!

Crushed by my Celebrity Crush's Height

Leave a Reply.

Weird Author

Your Favorites

My Favorites

Categories

Archives