some thing improve with age
Jon Bon Jovi now
Flashback to my last year in college:

I’m in a business class and we’re discussing job interviews. One of the students raises his hand and says, “It’s not fair. I’ve got great grades and I’m a hard worker, but as soon as I walk into an interview I know I don’t have a shot, all because of my hair.”

He was right. Why? He had Jon Bon Jovi hair. No, not the cool stylings of the present day Bon Jovi. This was the Eighties, people. His tresses looked like a teased out poodle with twenty-inch long hair extensions had exploded on his head.

Now a lot of girls thought Bon Jovi's hair was totally rad back then, but interviewers? Different story.

Anyway, the teacher looked at the guy and said, “Why don’t you just cut your hair?”

He said, “Because it’s me.  Why can’t people just look passed it to see the kind of guy I am?”

Then the teacher said, “If people have to look passed your hair to see the real you, then maybe your hair really isn’t ‘you.’”

Interesting point.

Long story short: the kid cut his hair and landed a job soon afterward. Ain’t it sweet when things wrap up so easily?

You know, we keep being told ‘you can’t judge a book by its cover’? Still, we do it all the time. Why? Maybe because we can make certain judgements based on one’s appearance. After all, the way people dress reflects who they are, right? Just go through any high school in the U.S. and it's not too tough to point out the jocks, goths, preps, nerds and stoners pretty easily. As for the Eighties? I've got to tell you, even back then a guy with Bon Jovi hair would not have been pegged as a smart, hard working Business major. Looks like this case is closed.


However...

Though sometimes the way people dress reflects who they are, sometimes it just doesn't. Some people hide behind their clothes as if they were wearing a mask. Others feel pressure to blend in and wear clothes for approval. Others just wear what's hanging in the closet without care for what message they're sending. 

Isn't it funny how what one person feels totally comfortable wearing can make someone else feel totally uncomfortable? I still remember when Laura Ashley dresses were popular in the Eighties. If you don't know what one looked like back then, here's a 'vintage’ one available on eBay:
Picture
Girls wore them with hairbows, pearls, and -- here’s the really embarrassing part -- bobby socks and Keds. The look was hot. The look was cool. This meant, of course, I bought one. 

When I wore it I felt like a moron.

Not that I didn’t look good. The dress was beautiful and I had all the proper accessories. But it wasn’t me. What many considered comfortable, I considered a costume. Even though I blended in, I felt like I stood out.

But back to the whole 'job' thing. Let's say there are two girls. One is wearing sweats, gym shoes, and the whole ponytail-with-a-rubber-band-around-the-head thing. Another is wearing a black leather jacket, matching lipstick, and a nose ring. If I needed someone to help me with an after school fitness program for kids, who do you think I'd hire first? For all I know, the goth chick is an awesome athlete and great with kids, but she sure not dressed for the part.

If you want a certain job you’ve got to dress for it.  That's always been the case. We don’t see a lot of accountants running around in kimonos and bamboo flip flops, do we? Still, what about that lone accountant who really wants to wear one? What if wearing a kimono reflects who he or she really is?

I don’t know if I have any real answers here. I just know if you want to be taken seriously, you’ve got to dress that way. When it comes to work -- heck, when it comes to life -- sometimes you’re required to wear a costume. It sucks, but it's true.

So judging a book by it's cover? We have to recognize that people do it every day. As for how we use this information, that's up to the individual.

So take a look at yourself right now. I'm curious. Does what you’re wearing reflect the real you? If it does, how? If it doesn’t, why?

Just a point to ponder.

         
 


Comments

02/24/2011 10:34

Personally, I don't see any connection between the real me and how I dress except that it's how I choose to dress. I'm not responsible for what others read into it. As for making the right impression on a job interview or in any social situation, I agree one has to live up to expectations or risk failure. This, fortunately, is a dilemma I have been spared or, should I say, have spared myself in life.

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02/24/2011 10:40

I am currently in school and for the types of jobs we are applying to, unfortunately, businesses want people that fit their mold and are not considered "risky." I am not a conformist but I do have to make a living.

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02/24/2011 11:38

NP,
Lucky you! For it to matter what you wear, it has to matter to you. How great to live a life where you don't have to worry about it.

Marc,
As they say, you've got to give to get. If you're on the job representing someone's company, they have a right to expect you to look a certain way. Off the job, though? I give you permission to dress a little crazy. ;)

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02/24/2011 14:03

You said it all when you said this: "If you want a certain job you’ve got to dress for it. That's always been the case."

What I am wearing now is yoga wear and it suits me fine as I work at home. However, when I work elsewhere I dress more conventionally and have no problem doing that. I'm not in my teens or twenties so I'm not attempting to find my identity by wearing clothing that reflect I am a member of this sub-culture group or that sub-culture group. I find it amusing to see legions of teens and young adults who think they are expressing their individuality by wearing clothes and hairdos, tc. that reflect their identification with either sub-culture groups or with celebrities.

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02/24/2011 14:19

TT,
Ah, yes. Working from home = comfy clothes. Love it! You're right, I've also found it funny when I see a bunch of people wearing the exact same thing. So much for individuality!

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02/24/2011 17:29

Wow. I could so identify with you Janene. When you were talking about wearing something that looked good, fit the scene, and you felt more awkward than you would have wearing something else. I've worn some flashy clothes before, or tighter shirts, and not to be conceited, but they look fabulous on me. And of course I had a little jewelry, necklace, bracelet, watch, etc. And yet, I feel so self conscious when I go out. I'm much happier wearing a sweatsuit, or like today, jeans and a hoodie. It's just comfortable. And I got rid of all the jewelry. I can't wear it to weddings or funerals, but when I don't have to wear something special, that's what does it for me.

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02/24/2011 18:03

Justus,
A man who knows what I'm talking about. It doesn't matter how good you look in an outfit. If it's not you, it feel so wrong. And I'm sure you look fab in a jeans and hoodie, so stick with it. Look good + feel good = is good.

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Katja
02/24/2011 22:11

I agree that people judge by appearance. Not everyone, but enough people to see that it's apparent. I also agree that a person's clothing reflects who they are, because after all, it's personal style. It's controlable and can change.

Just wanted to share my opinions...

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02/25/2011 05:53

Katja,
I LOVE it when you share your opinions. :) You're right, clothes reflect one's personal style. Sure, there are those who don't care how they look, but that's also demonstrated by their appearance.

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02/25/2011 12:31

One of the things I love most about my job is that I can wear *almost* anything I want. I can wear jeans and Converse every day and in the summer when it's hot I can wear tank tops.

I'm fairly heavily tattooed, and I don't have to hide any tattoos or piercings.

That being said, I've worked places where I've had to dress much more corporate. Yesterday my boss asked me at the last minute to go across the street to a trade show and I was a bit horrified. I pointed out that I wasn't really dressed to be garnering business. :)

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02/25/2011 12:43

Tershbango,
I suppose that depends on what type of buisness you're trying to garner! Being able to wear what you want at work is a seriously undervalued perk. It was so awesome when my hubbie's job's dress code got more casual. A lot less expensive, too.

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02/26/2011 11:38

As a retired high school teacher, I remember teaching business classes and discussing the whole notion of dressing for interviews. If nothing else, it always got a lot of different opinions expressed. None of which could compete with 'dressing for the employer's expectation'. After all, you can be whoever you want, wear whatever you want.... but if someone is paying you, then they want you to fill a role. And that role often comes with a dress code.

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02/26/2011 11:44

PhotoDiction,
"If someone is payinng you, then they want to fill a role." Absolutely. People can dress how they want on their own time, but a buisness has the right to expect you to dress a certain way.

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