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You are what you wear?

2/24/2011

13 Comments

 
some thing improve with age
Jon Bon Jovi now
Flashback to my last year in college:

I’m in a business class and we’re discussing job interviews. One of the students raises his hand and says, “It’s not fair. I’ve got great grades and I’m a hard worker, but as soon as I walk into an interview I know I don’t have a shot, all because of my hair.”

He was right. Why? He had Jon Bon Jovi hair. No, not the cool stylings of the present day Bon Jovi. This was the Eighties, people. His tresses looked like a teased out poodle with twenty-inch long hair extensions had exploded on his head.

Now a lot of girls thought Bon Jovi's hair was totally rad back then, but interviewers? Different story.

Anyway, the teacher looked at the guy and said, “Why don’t you just cut your hair?”

He said, “Because it’s me.  Why can’t people just look passed it to see the kind of guy I am?”

Then the teacher said, “If people have to look passed your hair to see the real you, then maybe your hair really isn’t ‘you.’”

Interesting point.

Long story short: the kid cut his hair and landed a job soon afterward. Ain’t it sweet when things wrap up so easily?

You know, we keep being told ‘you can’t judge a book by its cover’? Still, we do it all the time. Why? Maybe because we can make certain judgements based on one’s appearance. After all, the way people dress reflects who they are, right? Just go through any high school in the U.S. and it's not too tough to point out the jocks, goths, preps, nerds and stoners pretty easily. As for the Eighties? I've got to tell you, even back then a guy with Bon Jovi hair would not have been pegged as a smart, hard working Business major. Looks like this case is closed.


However...

Though sometimes the way people dress reflects who they are, sometimes it just doesn't. Some people hide behind their clothes as if they were wearing a mask. Others feel pressure to blend in and wear clothes for approval. Others just wear what's hanging in the closet without care for what message they're sending. 

Isn't it funny how what one person feels totally comfortable wearing can make someone else feel totally uncomfortable? I still remember when Laura Ashley dresses were popular in the Eighties. If you don't know what one looked like back then, here's a 'vintage’ one available on eBay:
Picture
Girls wore them with hairbows, pearls, and -- here’s the really embarrassing part -- bobby socks and Keds. The look was hot. The look was cool. This meant, of course, I bought one. 

When I wore it I felt like a moron.

Not that I didn’t look good. The dress was beautiful and I had all the proper accessories. But it wasn’t me. What many considered comfortable, I considered a costume. Even though I blended in, I felt like I stood out.

But back to the whole 'job' thing. Let's say there are two girls. One is wearing sweats, gym shoes, and the whole ponytail-with-a-rubber-band-around-the-head thing. Another is wearing a black leather jacket, matching lipstick, and a nose ring. If I needed someone to help me with an after school fitness program for kids, who do you think I'd hire first? For all I know, the goth chick is an awesome athlete and great with kids, but she sure not dressed for the part.

If you want a certain job you’ve got to dress for it.  That's always been the case. We don’t see a lot of accountants running around in kimonos and bamboo flip flops, do we? Still, what about that lone accountant who really wants to wear one? What if wearing a kimono reflects who he or she really is?

I don’t know if I have any real answers here. I just know if you want to be taken seriously, you’ve got to dress that way. When it comes to work -- heck, when it comes to life -- sometimes you’re required to wear a costume. It sucks, but it's true.

So judging a book by it's cover? We have to recognize that people do it every day. As for how we use this information, that's up to the individual.

So take a look at yourself right now. I'm curious. Does what you’re wearing reflect the real you? If it does, how? If it doesn’t, why?

Just a point to ponder.

         
13 Comments

Happy Anniversary to me

2/17/2011

19 Comments

 
Yep. It's true. One year ago today (well, actually tomorrow) I gave birth to baby #4 -- this blog! Want to know how I'm going to celebrate?
Picture
I'M GOING TO RELAX.

That's right. I've got my Lindt chocoloate truffles, my favorite blankie, and a slew of '30 Rock' episodes waiting for me on Hulu. Tonight's dinner? Mac n' cheese.

Boy, do I feel naughty.
 
As for my weekly post? I'll catch you next Thursday. Until then, thanks so much for following me. I hope you've had as much fun reading as I've had writing.

Ciao for now!

MOM


UPDATE: A lot of advanced planning and work went into ensuring I would get the stress-free 'me' day I so wanted today. That included me writing this post yesterday morning so I wouldn't have to do it today. Since that time, I've received a letter in the mail informing me I never turned in some mandatory dental health form for one of my kids, so now a good portion of my day will be spent downloading the form, running it over to the dentist's office, then sitting and waiting while it's filled out. Plus the folks over there are going to nail me because it's been eight months since my kids' last dental appointment when they should be having them every six months. As if I don't feel like a bad enough mom for the whole didn't-turn-in-the-form thing. Plus the cat just threw up on the rug. That shoots another half an hour.

So if you haven't already guessed, the Lindt truffles I reserved for today are almost gone and it's not even 8:30 AM. We're talking six truffles in a half-hour period. Still, I refuse to calculate how many calories that equals because this is MY day -- MINE! Do you hear me?

Okay, I know as I write this there's an Ethiopian farmer on the other side of the world beating dry, dusty earth with a hoe with the hopes of growing something to feed his family. My life could be worse. Still, is one day too much to ask for? 

I'll quite whining now and just stuff my face with another truffle --- See? Even THAT comment smacks of Marie Antionette.  Stopping now to count my blessings.... 


original photo credit here
 

19 Comments

All hail stupidity

2/10/2011

18 Comments

 
Picture
TV wasteland? Definitely.
“Two things are infinite: the universe and stupidity, and I’m not sure about the former.”
- Albert Einstein

There’s this girl. She’s smart, beautiful, and talented. Her grades? Great, too, but only because she works hard to maintain them. She’s on the volleyball team, is first chair in band, and just made National Honor Society, too. As for her boyfriend? He’s a nice guy who treats her well. Her parents are pretty cool, too.

So, wanna watch a TV show on her life?

OF COURSE NOT. Her life's boring! But there’s this other girl….

What a hot mess. Last year she quit school so she could work as a pole dancer to support her 10 month-old daughter. She’s not sure who the father is, but no worries. Her sights are set on a new baby daddy. Will it be the heavy metal biker who likes to spank her in public, the stoner with a World of Warcraft addiction, or the totally hot ladies’ man who also happens to be a pimp? Whoever it is, she better snag him soon -- her alcoholic mom is kicking her out of the house in a week.

YEAH, BABY! That’s what I’m talking about. We wanna watch HER!

And that, my dearies, it’s what wrong with America today.

Okay, I get it. The drama is crazy fun and over-the-top characters are a scream. But I’m so tired of the media rewarding stupidity and bad behavior by giving morons TV shows. I mean, what does that say about us?

I know, I know. Just because you watch it, doesn’t mean you’ll act that way. For most folks, that’s true. But there are others out there who aren’t so bright. They take their cues from the media, like those girls who are trying to get pregnant so they can be on ‘Teen Mom’ or the scores of people making embarrassing videos of themselves so they can be on ‘Real World.’ Heck, some just do it for 15 minutes of fame on YouTube.

It seems we’re moving from a culture that venerates those wise and honorable to one that idolizes the flamboyantly misguided. And while Snooki might be nabbing $10K per episode on ‘Jersey Shore,’ there are a lot more wannabes out there spending their minimum wage paychecks on bronzer and hair spray hoping to make it big.

Their chances don’t look good.

So go ahead and watch the stupid shows, just don't be fooled into thinking they've got the ticket to real success.

photo credit from Flickr autowich photo stream
18 Comments

Building confidence the hard way

2/3/2011

14 Comments

 
confidence cat lion
Hey, girls, need a confidence boost? Then I have a great solution:

HAVE SEX.

You heard me. “‘When you know what sex really feels like….it makes you confident in any situation.’” At least that’s what it says in this month's issue of Seventeen magazine. Just read ‘Love & Sex Secrets.’ I did.

Man, what joy I felt seeing that little nugget of truth displayed on the printed page.

First question's first, though: What was I doing reading Seventeen? Trust me, it had everything to do with my thirst for all things teenagery and nothing to do with a high school fundraiser my daughter participated in last semester. Honest.

But back to the sex/confidence thing....

Are you frickin' kidding me? I should have heard the warning bells when I read ‘The Rules of College Dating’ first. In it, Noelia of Wesleyan University offered Rule #6: Introduce your guy and roomie ASAP. Not bad advice. Then she goes on to say:

“If you like someone, introduce him to your roommate as soon as possible. If she’s friends with him too, she won’t care as much when he drops by your tiny dorm room all the time or sleeps over a few nights a week.”

Seriously? I say if you’re roommate’s boyfriend is constantly spending the night shave both of their heads while they’re sleeping. Or you could just report them. That’s been known to work.

Anyway, back to the sex/confidence thing again…

WTF, Seventeen? Please tell me you didn't mean the way it sounded.

And for all you girls out there, if you need a confidence boost go get a mani/pedi or add a few highlights to your hair. No money? Then just watch the latest Pink video or something. Trust me, having sex might not boost your confidence. In fact, it just might shatter it. So don't let anyone -- your boyfriend, your girlfriends, your psychotic pet hamster  -- and especially not some stupid magazine convince you to do anything you're not 100% ready to do. Got it?

And when you are finally ready? Still wait.

...Oh, come on. What did you expect me to say? I'm a mom after all, remember?

cat and lion photo credit

14 Comments
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